Netflix
by ThouArtBenvolio
Summary: Based on a true story, Jimmy doesn't seem to mind getting in legal trouble with Netflix. Johnny tries to knock sense into Jimmy, but will it work? This is somewhere in between humor and crackfic. Script format, SaintJesus friendship. Rated for cursing.


Johnny: Jimmy. Jimmy. Jimmy!

St. Jimmy: WHAT?

Johnny: Jimmy, what are you-? Netflix?

St. Jimmy: Yes, Johnny Cakes, I'm downloading Netflix.

Johnny: But Jimmy...you HATE movies.

St. Jimmy: Do not!

Johnny: Then why will you never watch a movie when I ask?

St. Jimmy: Because...You suck at picking them out.

Johnny: *pouts* Anyway...Why would you even want to spend your mon-

St. Jimmy: No, no, no, NO! You acutally think I would waste my cash on this shit?

Johnny: Well, yes, because that's the whole point of Netflix.

St. Jimmy: Forget that shit- I'm getting the free one-month trial!

Johnny: ...You still need a credit card.

St. Jimmy: Credit card? Fuck that...I only want the free trial! Then, when my trial runs out, I'll make a whole new account. Rince, repeat, Johnny Cakes, rince, repeat.

Johnny: Oh, so I guess you've thoroughly thought this out?

St. Jimmy: *with pride* Why, yes.

Johnny: But Jimmy, look here. *points to computer screen* They want your credit card number anyway.

St. Jimmy: Wha-? The fuck? I don't even own a credit card! *thinking* *grabs Johnny's cellphone*

Johnny: Jimmy, what are you-?

St. Jimmy: Hello? Yes, hi. I have a Wii, and I really want Netflix, but-

Johnny: You don't even have a Wii, that's Wills!

St. Jimmy: *covering phone* Shut the fuck up Johnny! Hello? Yes, sorry about that. _Anway_, the problem is, I don't have a credit card...What should I do? *puts phone on speaker*

Netflix Dude: I'm sorry, but a credit card is necissary to complete the Netflix account activation. There are a couple reasons for this. One is beacuse we don't want minors signing up for this without parental consent. Two is because if you don't return a movie we need to be able to contact you with a credit card.

St. Jimmy: Oh, I understand. *pause* What if I promise I'll pay all my movies on time?

Netflix Dude: I'm sorry, sir, but it's not up to-

St. Jimmy: Oh, Jesus!

Johnny: Yes?

St. Jimmy: Shut the fuck up, Johnny! _Anway_, I'm not even going to have the movies mailed, I just want them on the Wii!

Netflix Dude: It's still neciss-

St. Jimmy: If you let this slide, just this once, I can...repay you...wink, wink. I play for both teams.

Johnny: JIMMY!

St. Jimmy: Fucking God! I just want the fucking free trial anyway! *hangs up furiously*

Johnny: Sorry Jimmy, but I knew it just wasn't going to work-Jimmy, what are you doing? *looking at the computer screen*

St. Jimmy: *typing* Credit...card...numbers...that work...search!

Johnny: Jimmy, you actually think you're going to find some retard who'd put their credit card number on the internet?

St. Jimmy: Look Johnny, YouTube! Look at this video, this asshole in the video is giving his number out for anyone to use! Haha! That's his own fucking fault.

Johnny: Jimmy, that's illegal!

St. Jimmy: So is heroine, and that didn't stop you.

Johnny: *pouts*

St. Jimmy: Shit! It didn't work! Asshole!

Johnny: Figured...Wait...Google Images? Really now?

St. Jimmy: Look at this! There are a bunch of pictures of credit cards with the numbers and everything! Yes! *typing* Why the fuck won't any of these work?

Johnny: *rolls eyes*

St. Jimmy: *reaches into his wallet* Here, we go, I'll just try this...

Johnny: I thought you didn't have a credit card.

St. Jimmy: ...Do you think this Wendy's gift card will do? *types in number* I didn't even think so...

LATER THAT NIGHT

Johnny: SAINT FUCKING JIMMY! *runs into room*

St. Jimmy: *watching porn on the TV* Um...privacy?

Johnny: You...you used my fucking credit card, didn't you?

St. Jimmy: Yeah, what's it to you?

Johnny: Well, let's see, it's MINE.

St. Jimmy: Why the fuck should it matter? All I want it for is the fucking free trial.

Johnny: True...Now stop with the porn.

St. Jimmy: Um...no? *pause* Oh, I get it. You want to get it on, don't you? *walks up to Johnny seductivly, places hand on his chest*

Johnny: Actually, I figured since you used my credit card, I could use Netflix to watch Glee.

St. Jimmy: Get the fuck out.

Johnny: But...but...I need to see the Christmas episode! I was watching it online, and it just STOPPED right in the middle of Baby, It's Cold Outside! I was fucking pissed! Then, I went to check my credit card balance, and...here we are.

St. Jimmy: Nice story...get the fuck out now.

* * *

><p>AN: _This is a true story...minus the porn and the gay. My thirteen-year-old cousin was the Jimmy in this. I was the Johnny. Besides the cursing, this all happened. My cousin is going to get herself in deep trouble some day..._

_I don't own American Idiot or Glee...Oh, and the Glee part happened also!_

_Anyway, I was actually going to write this oneshot with Kurt and Blaine, but decided this woudl be much funnier with this duo._


End file.
